Foolish Desires

Foolish Desires

Before I fuck something else up

I leave it all to You
Not because I’m humble
But because of my unintended ignorance
And my not so unintended ignorance

What do I know?
In our pursuit to attain
Some imagined magical happiness
Sure
But the candy can be taken away

Like an ant
Attempting to use its great understanding
Of ant mounds
To understand existence
And the complexities of sweetnesses
Spinning on a cooling molten rock
Of cotton candy
Abandoned on the sidewalk
Billions of galaxies in
Trying to decipher the universe
Trying to avoid the ruthless necessity
Of pain,
This is what I’ve deciphered:
Existence is indecipherable

Our only hope is love
That great
Ungraspable, inescapable,
Indescribably
Awesome
Thing

When I was a baby
I used to cry loud
Even from the womb
In my mother’s kingdom
Demanding what I wanted
Purely desiring what I wanted
And that was
To be

Now as an older man
I no longer demand
I barely even want or pray
I try to think of simple ways
That I might help
For opportunities from GOD
To be of aide

My foolish desire these days
Is to bring GOD’s Kingdom
Down into my apartment

And move on from there

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